listening...

it's almost 2am... my alarm will be going off in 4 short hours... yet I sit here, one small room away, listening... I hear the mechanical noise of the projector casting fish across her ceiling, and the lullaby playing softly, I can hear her moans and cries from here, but that's not what I'm listening for... the baby monitor is in front of me... I watch the pendulum tick across the face of the screen indicating her movement... I stare at the temperature reading wondering if she's comfortable... I listen to her movements, her raspy breaths, the small cough, and wait... and wonder... is it the heater causing her to cough and breathe heavier, or might there be some other issue at work? she felt so warm to me earlier, but the thermometer said 98.4... she wakes up sobbing... was it a bad dream? is she in pain? I hate the not-knowing... do I take her upstairs to bed with me, knowing how cold our bedroom will be? or do I sleep in the rocker/recliner in her room, listening, waiting, wondering... soothing and comforting...she seems content, for the moment...

I'll be sleeping in her room tonight...

teething? how about teething with thrush!

sooooo yeah. I've been thinking that Goose's crankiness and waking up screaming has been just her regular cutting teeth process (which really, it's not much different from the norm when she's cutting teeth) but yesterday at her 15 month check-up upon opening G's mouth during that part of the examination our doctor (whom we absolutely LOVE) immediately said "oh! she has a bad case of thrush!" and it was INSTANT guilt for me. (thrush? what? what the hell is thrush? how does it happen? how could I not notice this? omg I'm a terrible mother!!) and when she pointed out that white film and white spots ALL OVER G's mouth, lips, tongue... all I could think was "that wasn't there yesterday... I was checking out her teeth yesterday, that was so not there!" so that relieved some of my bad momma guilt... and the Doc said "sometimes it can come on all of a sudden - like a yeast infection" which - well, they're similar right? so yeah. my poor Goose. cutting teeth and thrush. what a great combo. we picked up a prescription which is supposed to help clear it up soon, I sterilized all her paci's & bottle nipples last night (even though it's not contagious between people - as we're not nursing anymore I don't have to worry about getting it - woo hoo! 1 point for being weaned) and am wondering about sterilizing her toothbrush - or just tossing it & getting a new one (anyone have experience & words of wisdom here?)

also yesterday - at 15.5 months old, Goose is weighing in at a whopping 18 pounds 2 ounces (under the 5th percentile) and measuring just over 30 inches (in the 25th percentile) - no wonder she's still wearing 9 month & 12 month clothes... and that her pants - no matter what size! - are either fitting in the waist, but look like highwaters, or long enough and falling off her bum... ah well, could be worse right? ;) also discussed with our doctor G's walking, stair climbing, running, talking, etc. and looks like we're doing great developmentally as well as physically... so thankful to have a healthy toddler! she's going to hate being in a rear-facing carseat for the rest of her life isn't she?

yesterday was also traumatic for her because she had to get shots... yes I know, she's 15 months old, and has been getting immunizations every 3 months since birth... except for her 12 month appointment when she had a cold, so we held those off until yesterday... the reason it was so traumatic after so many other shots? we're weaned. yeah. previously, we've nursed through the process of getting the immunizations... G was pause - sometimes let out a small cry - then go right back to nursing... barely phased her (oh, and we're mean - we don't give her Tylenol or Motrin before shots... we're trying to keep her drug free as much as possible ya know?) but yesterday... there was no nursing. just me, holding her close on my lap, keeping her arms tucked in out of the nurse's way while trying to keep G focused on the book I was reading to her... no such luck. she watched as the nurse (whom we also LOVE!) poked that first needle into her chunky little thigh, and then.... bloodcurdling screams ensued. (the nurse even took a few minutes between the second & third shots - which were in opposite legs - to give Goose a chance to catch her breath, because those screams were only coming out... no air was going back in!) my poor Goose. she cried a few more minutes after the nurse left the room, then let me get her dressed and we headed out...

she did great the rest of the day/night as we visited my office and headed home, she ate well, got to bed at a decent hour, slept well... and I pre-warned her daycare about the thrush & 4 shots... okayed Motrin if she's bad, and asked to call for an early pick-up if she's just miserable (I'm not hoping for that - as I don't want her to be miserable, but I wouldn't mind another early day and cuddling my Goose!)

so yeah. how's that for a fun Tuesday?

success!! and then not...

so yeah. y'all might know (or not?) that we're co-sleepers... we've co-slept since we brought Goose home from the hospital, and with the exclusion of the one month she slept in her crib at the 8month mark - she's been sleeping in our bed up until present day (at approx. 15.5 months old) and up until the last month or two it's been just fabulous.. hubs works nights, and even on his nights off stays up most of the night, so G & I just cuddle all night long... well, until she started squirming. this kid moves so much in the night... seriously, she's often got her feet in my face, or ribs, or her head down by my knees... it's crazy!

so last Sunday we had an Open House (cuz ya know, our house is on the market - any buyers out there?) and I packed up the pack & play Saturday night while cleaning, and took her to bed with me, same as usual... well, Sunday night it was getting late, I was tired, I didn't want to get the P&P back out - so I figured, eh, what the heck - let's give the crib another try... and you won't believe it - but it worked!! she slept in her crib ALL NIGHT LONG! for 5 whole nights! well... the majority of 5 whole nights... 2 of those nights she woke up around 2am-2:30am (darn teeth!!) and was very restless... I spent the next 3 hours with her in the rocker in her room... before putting her back in the crib & heading back to bed when hubs got home (she probably would have been okay in there earlier than 5/5:30am - but I had fallen asleep - it happens.) and then over the weekend, hubs was off work - so when she woke up in the middle of the night (2am-3am-ish) hubs gave her a bottle - but couldn't get her to stay asleep once he placed her in the crib... so instead, he brought her up to me... so yeah. the past two nights she's been in her crib from 9ish- 2ish, then in bed with me until I got up (9ish yesterday, 6ish today)...

hubs is back on duty tonight and I'm hoping the past two nights didn't set us back too far... going to try once again for a decent bedtime (like, before 10 would be fantastic) and crossing my fingers that she stays in the crib all night (ya know, minus the middle of the night bottle)...

speaking of the "middle of the night bottle" ... I'd read and been told a million times that you should wean your child off the bottle at the one-year mark... well... I think Goose has been bottle-free at daycare for 2-3 weeks now (she was getting one in the mornings still) but at home we still do one before bed, and in the middle of the night - and sometimes even one first thing in the morning if it's been a long time... I'm thinking that we're going to start trying a sippy of milk before bed, and still a bottle in the night and see how that goes... if that goes well, maybe soon we'll ditch the middle of the night bottle too...

which brings me to another musing... when should she no longer be waking up to eat in the night? should I start giving her some type of before bed snack with her milk? (be assured, I'll be asking her doctor tomorrow at Goose's 15month check-up - just wondering what the general consensus is out there in BlogLand...)

have a great Monday y'all...

are we doing something wrong?

so while commenting on another's blog, I found myself thinking about how much Goose talks (or doesn't, as the case may be) and find myself wondering if we're doing something wrong? G will be 15 months old tomorrow (okay, technically today, as it's now after midnight - why am I not sleeping?? good question. I do have to work in the morning... ack. off topic.) back to the topic at hand --> and really the only words she says consistently or very often are "mom, momma, hi, uh oh, ball" and sometimes she says "da dee"... she doesn't sign (which is completely our fault... I had intended to start with her a while back... but only knew a few signs, kept forgetting to pick up a Baby Sign book, and here we are, still haven't done it, FAIL.) everything else she says - pure gibberish... I'm sure she knows what she is saying, but me? not a clue. are we talking too much and not letting her practice words on us? are we not talking enough and teaching her words she can use? her 15 month checkup is April 20th - and I'm a little anxious that the Dr. is going to say "what is she saying" and when I tell her G's list, she'll say "uhh... that's it?" and I'm also having some guilt that we haven't even tried to start teaching her body parts... like "nose, eyes, ears" etc... the only one I say often is "feet" and usually it follows "who has stinky...?" after removing her socks while changing her diaper/clothes... (by the way, she thinks this is hilarious when I smell her feet and either loudly exclaim "ohhh!" or "peeeeyyooooooooo - stinky feet!" and gives me great big belly laughs - which I love) :) so yeah... anyway. my 15 month old has like 5 understandable words in her vocabulary... so, are we doing something wrong? what can we do better? how do we expand her vocab? read more? talk more? talk less? I'm open to suggestions, advice, etc (but please be nice... I'm very good at the guilt-trip on my own, thanks!)

Hot Mama Handbags Giveaway!!

so I've been looking for a new purse for a while now... my current purse is just too tiny (and jam-packed full of course!) and other purses I have hanging around (read: stuffed in the bottom of my closet) aren't going to cut the mustard either... what I've been looking for is something cute, not excessively huge, but large enough to fit a small container of wipes, a diaper or two, and if I could fit a sippy cup, a paci, as well as my miscellaneous crap (i.e. wallet, change, chapstick, mascara, etc.) that would be like... oh... just magical. my current diaper bag is fantastic - but its a back-pack style diaper bag, I'm looking for a purse that could hold a few extras, not a new diaper bag :) ENTER Hot Mama Handbags!! I just found this giveaway sponsored by Newly Wed Newly Bred - and I'm spreading the news :) these handbags look awesome, they're chic, stylish, and best of all - customizable!! saweet!! I'm soooo hoping to win one of these - but in the event that I don't... I just might have to ask for one for my birthday ;)