SOC Sunday: I count to three...

This is my 5 minute Stream of Consciousness Sunday post hosted by all.things.fadra. It’s five minutes of your time and a brain dump. Want to try it? Here are the rules…

• Set a timer and write for 5 minutes only.
• Write an intro to the post if you want but don’t edit the post. No proofreading or spellchecking. This is writing in the raw.
• Publish it somewhere. Anywhere. The back door to your blog if you want. But make it accessible.
• Add the Stream of Consciousness Sunday badge to your post.
• Link up your post below.
• Visit your fellow bloggers and show some love.

INTRO: this may be quite a jumbled post as I have a toddler clinging to my arm - although she really wants to hold my hand... we'll see how it goes... timer... ready... and... GO!

"one"... "two"... my voice is low & stern... and sometimes I don't even get to "two" before Goose decides she's going to comply with my (unreasonable?) demands... "Goose, please pick your crayons up off the floor and put them back on the table" or "Goose, stop jumping on the couch!" and I always follow it up with a "thank you Goose! good listening!" but really... I can't help but think of what my dad always says when my sister or I (or my mom) "counts"... "why are you counting?? you're just giving them time to think about whether or not to obey the rules" and while I somewhat think he has a point (I mean, yeah, does have a point, I shouldn't have to ask her to do something eleventy billion times before she actually does it) but also - she's two... she's easily distracted, she's more into playing and having fun than picking up her toys, crayons, or worrying about her own safety... so I guess I see the counting as more of a way to get her attention than giving her a chance to decide if she's going to do as I've asked or not.... 

do you count??

SOC Sunday: one or three??

This is my 5 minute Stream of Consciousness Sunday post hosted by all.things.fadra. It’s five minutes of your time and a brain dump. Want to try it? Here are the rules…

• Set a timer and write for 5 minutes only.
• Write an intro to the post if you want but don’t edit the post. No proofreading or spellchecking. This is writing in the raw.
• Publish it somewhere. Anywhere. The back door to your blog if you want. But make it accessible.
• Add the Stream of Consciousness Sunday badge to your post.
• Link up your post below.
• Visit your fellow bloggers and show some love.

INTRO: This brain dump is brought on by a connversation Hubs and I have repeatedly had over the past several years... and again just this past week... timer... ready... and... GO!

I am one of two children, my sister is 19mos younger than I am, and for the most part, it was an awesome way to grow up. We had our fights and jealousies at times, but we've always been super close, and we're best friends. Hubs is the youngest (and only boy) of three... he & his sisters aren't super close, but Hubs is kinda antisocial and a homebody, so that's partly to blame I think ;) All growing up I've always wanted two kids. I didn't want an only child, because I loved having a sibling, but I didn't want three, as I thought one would always be left out... so I'd decided long ago, two kids was it. Well, Hubs has always said "one, or three" and I still don't get his logic... I mean, his logic for wanting three (excuse his cynical morbid cop-brain) is that if something were to happen to one of them, they wouldn't be left alone... okay, I guess I can see where that would be "logical" if you think like that (I don't generally, and I've had a LOT of tragic way-too-early deaths in my family) but then where does that leave us if we were to have one child? if something happens to that ONE child - then what are we left with?? and why would anyone want that?? (*not why would someone want just one child, why one child when you think like Hubs does...)

wow. time went faster than my fingers...

Stream of Consciousness Sunday: Who Do You Choose?

This is my 5 minute Stream of Consciousness Sunday post hosted by all.things.fadra. It’s five minutes of your time and a brain dump. Want to try it? Here are the rules…

• Set a timer and write for 5 minutes only.
• Write an intro to the post if you want but don’t edit the post. No proofreading or spellchecking. This is writing in the raw.
• Publish it somewhere. Anywhere. The back door to your blog if you want. But make it accessible.
• Add the Stream of Consciousness Sunday badge to your post.
• Link up your post below.
• Visit your fellow bloggers and show some love.

INTRO: This brain dump is brought on by a blog I recently came upon written by a woman who lost her sister & brother in law in a car accident, with their 6wk old infant being the only survivor... she, and her husband, are now raising their niece, along with their two children... also contributing - the movie Life As We Know It which I watched twice on Friday night... these things have been swirling through my head, time to dump them out, and see if I've learned anything I guess... timer... ready... and... GO!

so we haven't drawn up a will or anything... when Goose was new still we started a Living Trust - but then we got to some of the tough questions, like "who will raise your child if you both die" type questions, and that's when we stopped... Goose just turned two, and we haven't finished the LT... which freaks me out a bit. I don't want to be morbid or anything, but honestly - car accidents, shootings, freak accidents... they happen every day... plus, Hubs is a cop. I mean, c'mon... he puts his life on the line every single day - for real. the chances of something happening to both of us are slimmer, but still there... I know who I want to raise Goose if that ever happens, but we don't have it in writing... and we should. Not only for Goose's protection, but for the peace of mind it will give us... I don't want the courts to get her, not for one single second... I want her with those who love her best, aside from us of course... time to just do it. stop stalling,

Stream of Consciousness Sunday: Guilty

This is my 5 minute Stream of Consciousness Sunday post hosted by all.things.fadra. It’s five minutes of your time and a brain dump. Want to try it? Here are the rules…

• Set a timer and write for 5 minutes only.
• Write an intro to the post if you want but don’t edit the post. No proofreading or spellchecking. This is writing in the raw.
• Publish it somewhere. Anywhere. The back door to your blog if you want. But make it accessible.
• Add the Stream of Consciousness Sunday badge to your post.
• Link up your post below.
• Visit your fellow bloggers and show some love.

Guilty. that's how I'm feeling right now. for several different reasons. earlier I had a few brief moments of jealousy for people who aren't wives and mothers. people who can actually be selfish, put themselves first, do what THEY want to do, instead of what their spouse or children need/want of them. I know that this happens to lots of people, and it only lasted for a few moments, but the guilt part? this jealousy thing - was brought on by a teeny-bopper kids show on Disney that caught my attention... and Goose - she wanted to watch Dora. seriously? SERIOUSLY? I'm throwing a hissy fit over a DISNEY show? ugh. what in the world have I become. but the guilt actually then got worse. because a few minutes later as I rocked my Goose to sleep for her nap, I started thinking about all of my friends, family, and so many acquaintances who would kill to be in my shoes. I thought of my sister, who just before Christmas miscarried her second child...

*holy crap that went by fast.

a mother's worst fear...

This is my 5 minute Stream of Consciousness Sunday post hosted by all.things.fadra. It’s five minutes of your time and a brain dump. Want to try it? Here are the rules…

• Set a timer and write for 5 minutes only.
• Write an intro to the post if you want but don’t edit the post. No proofreading or spellchecking. This is writing in the raw.
• Publish it somewhere. Anywhere. The back door to your blog if you want. But make it accessible.
• Add the Stream of Consciousness Sunday badge to your post.
• Link up your post below.
• Visit your fellow bloggers and show some love.

I'm apologizing in advance for yet another depressing post... wow three in a row, that must be a record for me... I suck.

I found out this morning that a friend and former co-worker of my sister is currently at the hospital with her teenage son who was in a car accident last night... a very, very, bad car accident. He was with 4 other teenagers, and the vehicle hit a tree at 120mph. The driver was drunk and has been arrested, but apparently walked away without serious injuries... the passenger was also released from the hospital today... the other two teenagers in the backseat with the friend's son were killed, and the friend's son? was ejected from the car and thrown 30 feet. he's currently on life support. the doctor's say he has no brain activity and he's messed up pretty bad... he's a senior in high school... and his mom may soon have to make the decision to take him off life support... it's a double hit of a mother's worst fear... not only the loss of a child, but having to decide not to continue the life-saving machines that are keeping him alive...

my heart absolutely breaks for her... my prayers are with her and their family, and I'm wishing for a miracle for them. God provides miracles every day, so I'm not giving up hope yet. He will do as He sees fit, and I'm praying that He surrounds the family with His love in this difficult, heartbreaking time.